Things look different from the outside

The other day I told a friend that her strength and her faith were inspiring to me. Its true, I see her as such a strong person. She lost her husband in a farm accident at the age of 27. They had a 5 month old baby at the time. I can't imagine, nor do I ever want to find out, just how difficult that would be. Two years later, she has such a positive outlook. She's a great mom, working to support herself and her son (who is cute as can be and a mirror image of his daddy in so many ways), while finding time to help on her family's farm and teach her son all about farming as well as the person his daddy was so that he can feel like he knows his dad, even though they had less than 5 months on this earth together. All the while she seems to have this unwavering faith in God, which I'm sure is what helps her survive day to day. I truly think of her almost everyday and find such inspiration through the way she lives her life. But here's the thing that got me thinking. When I told her how strong she was, she replied with "Thank you, but I sure don't feel strong most days." And it made me think about how others often see us so much differently than we may feel or may see ourselves.

I think in most cases, a person is so much harder on themselves than others would be. Its easy to get bogged down with the day-to-day stress and the challenges we face. To feel like you're not getting anywhere, not being all you can be or all you want to be. So now and then I think its important to have someone from the "outside looking in" to remind you that you're stronger than you feel. That affirmation from the "outside", whether you may fully believe the person or not, can do a lot for you. At least it does for me. When I was in college, I had a friend tell me once, "I admire you. You can do anything." I thought he was crazy, and I told him so. But he went on to explain how he had watched me, over the previous year, do so many "new" things, things I may have been really nervous about at first, and then go on to be successful at them. I still thought he was slightly crazy. :) But the more I thought about it, I started to see what he was saying. Every once in a while, even 9 years later, when I am contemplating doing something I'm not sure I can do, I still think about that comment...and think, "Hmm, maybe he's right. Maybe I can do anything if I just try..."

Similarly, I've noticed too that I see what my husband does to provide for us and I am truly in awe of and so proud of him. He has so much knowledge, the ability to just figure things out when it comes to mechanical issues, can balance the many aspects of farming when planning for the year, or even just the week or just for today, and somehow he isn't constantly stressed with it all! I tell him (probably not often enough) that I think he's a great farmer, heck other people tell him too (I think it means more to him from others, he probably thinks I "have to" say he's good at it ;) ), but he is always saying things like "Well, it would be better if I could have done x, y and z." He also swears, "Anybody can farm, its not that hard." I beg to differ, I know I couldn't do it!
I'm not sure what my point is, maybe just that sometimes we need to step back and look at ourselves from another's point of view to really appreciate ourselves and what we do and are capable of. Just some food for thought I guess!